If you google “iPhone 5” a plethora of articles pop up in which writers have speculated, predicted, agonized, and foamed at the mouth about when the iPhone 5 would be gracing us with its presence.  Many were horrified this week to learn that the iPhone 5 is not Apple’s next prototype of the world’s most beloved phone. Drum roll please…let me introduce the iPhone 4S!  Excited?!?!?!  Yeah, me neither.

These are features of the new iPhone 4S along with my review:

–        A super-fast dual core A5 chip = Boring

–        A fancy new camera = Who cares

–        The “Intelligent Assistant” Siri = You can’t fool me Apple, this is voice activation with notes

Overall, this not a must have phone; this is a sit and twiddle your thumbs and wait till the iPhone 5 is launched phone.  The feature Apple is really trying to sell consumers on with the iPhone 4S is Siri, Apple’s “intelligent assistant” that allows you to talk to your phone.  Siri can take notes and make calls for you.  I already have voice activation on my current iPhone.  I never use it.  I would find Siri impressive if she could actually pick up my dry cleaning instead of just allowing me to remind myself I need to do it.  I already fight daily with autocorrect on my iPhone when I text.  The last thing I need is to add a verbally abusive relationship with Siri into the mix.

The biggest design flaw of the iPhone 4 was the antenna located around the outside of the phone.  This design flaw leads to dropped calls.  Apple decided not to address any inquiries about why they would leave the design flaw in tact with the iPhone 4S.  Instead, they only offered to tell you all about a chip, camera, and intelligent assistant.  Again, you can’t fool me, Apple.  This is the same phone with a couple more bells and whistles and a bumper (which is sold separately for $29) as a band aid.

The disappointment felt after the announcement of the iPhone 4S was wide spread.  Investors sold stock moments after the underwhelming announcement was made.  Shares dipped as much as 5 percent before ending down around 0.6 percent.  The overall announcement by new CEO Tim Cook lacked the super sweet swagger that former CEO Steve Jobs brought to the table as well.  Cook passed many moments that were his time to shine to other top executives.  Sometimes it’s good to pass the ball.  This was the time for Cook to show us his slam dunk skills and he chose instead to sit on the bench during key plays.

If Apple wants to remain the coolest kid at the party they need to bring it.  Its cult followers are hungry for more and the iPhone 4S isn’t going satisfy that need. Give the people what they crave, Apple!  Give us a redesigned iPhone 5, not something that can be categorized as “same, same, but different”.